From Bed-Sharing to a Toddler Bed
My daughter is 20 months old. Until now, she has been bed-sharing. I want to change this into having her sleep in a bed by herself. Do you have any suggestions or advice?
Since your toddler has been in the habit of sleeping with you right from day one, you'll probably find that the transition to sleeping on her own is easier on her—and on you—if you start easing her into her own bed—and her own room—in stages.
Some parents decide to move their toddler into his or her own bed in their room initially (as opposed to moving the toddler down the hall into a bed of his or her own). Other parents find it works best to tackle the bed change and the room change at the same time—but to have a parent "room in" with the toddler in his or her new room. (The parent can either sleep in a spare bed in the toddler's room or on an airbed on the floor.)
Whichever approach you decide to take, you'll probably find it works best if you keep your toddler's bedtime routine as familiar as possible. If your toddler is used to being tucked in with a special stuffed animal after you read her two bedtime stories and sing her a particular lullaby, you'll obviously want to continue to incorporate those comforting and familiar rituals into her new bedtime routine.
Some parents also find it works well to get their toddler involved in planning the move to the new bed. They may take their toddler shopping for a new set of sheets and then give their toddler a chance to test-drive the new bed at nap-time so that their toddler has already had a chance to try out its features before he or she decides to stay there overnight.
Some parents take a similarly laissez-faire approach to the actual bed move, allowing their toddler to decide when the time is right to make the move from the family bed to his or her own bed. Other parents take a more active role in encouraging the process along.
Some toddlers take to their new sleeping arrangements right away. Others take a little longer to feel at home in their new surroundings. Don't be surprised if your toddler calls out in the night—or if she toddles down the hall before the crack of dawn—seeking reassurance that you're still there. With patience and reassurance from you, she'll begin to feel at home in her own bed.
- Ann Douglas